Disclaimer- Everything to follow this is completely satirical. It is not meant for anyone to catch feelings. These comments are childish, immature, and nonfactual.
No matter what anyone says or what anyone tries to make you think, religion plays an integral part in everyone’s life. It is on our money, it is everywhere, and during the throws of sexual passion it is on everyone’s mouth.
Ew. Sexual passion…mouth…lol.
Now we are constantly treading the fine line of religion and reason and sometimes you must veer to one side, but one thing I am very adamant about is –
(Its not gay marriage…they can do what ever they want)
Sex on Sunday.
Yes.
Sex on a Sunday is going against everything we are raised taught to do on a regular basis. Now we are all thought to not have sex before marriage, (unlike me, I am a virgin…virgin fo lyfe), not to drink, (some of you are hungover/drunk reading this RIGHT now), and not to play with yourself.
Now church/state are separated and that is great for the other minority religions in this country to practice their own and speak out.
But sex on a Sunday? Strict no no. I am really cool for all day Saturday and all day Monday and even Sunday night, but sex on a time where we are supposed to be going to church is just downright disrespectful. That makes me think though, what is wrong with us now a days that we need specific rules to govern when I stick my peniculour muscle in her vigrinitus griptus.
Now the main argument against sex on Sunday is that I should be going to church as it is. Now many people I know DO NOT go to church so they do not care, but we are supposed to. So if I wake up next to a girl and she wants to do it, BUT I am supposed to be praising the Lord at that same time…it is not going to happen.
Tease all you want, I do not want Jesus asking me why I was getting down with the business of getting down when I was supposed to be singing.
Now, I am all about sex on Saturday GOING INTO Sunday which or even Sunday night, but Sunday morning? Get out.
People get excommunicated for that kind of stuff.
Does this not raise an interesting question? In college it is rare to see a very religious kid. The most common saying has to be,
“When did I realize if I was God? When I was praying and I felt I was talking to myself”
Everyone’s idea of religion should be respected no matter WHAT the idea is.
Now no matter what, if you are hitting it right you are going to hear God during sex.
In many languages.
Lets not get into death.
Adios Meo.
That was DEFINITELY spelt wrong.





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