My Daily Rant - 5.13.08 - Ew. Tampons.

Disclaimer- Everything to follow this is completely satirical. It is not meant for anyone to catch feelings. These comments are childish, immature, and nonfactual.

Happy Birthday Scott and Jessica

http://www.collegehumor.com/article:1755177
Hit I like. Thanks!
http://www.collegehumor.com/article:1755177

My foot is freezing. I cannot find my other sock. You do not understand how much I miss that sock. But that sock apparently did not fit me anymore? I think it does but it does not think so. Some say I need to change my stitching in it because it does not match my other one. The other sock is repulsed by the one I have.

You ever hear the story about the boy who cried wolf? Where he constantly said there was a wolf in the woods only to get attention and they always came to his aide. But when he had called and no wolf was there, eventually they had grown callous towards him and stopped coming to his aide. Finally the last time he called wolf there really was a wolf and no one cared because they all thought he was lying. The wolf came and guess what it did?

It ate that little piece of crap. With steak sauce too. He is now wanted as a sex offender in 6 states.

No one took that kid seriously. You know who is a real life version of that?

Moi.

That means “me” in French you uncultured college students.

People take me seriously at times. It always happens when I say a joke about them or their significant other and what I would do to them.

Those jokes NEVER go over well.

But on the grand scale of things, everything I say or do has deteriorated into, “YOU SHOULD WRITE A RANT ABOUT THAT”. Seriously. I could be sitting there bleeding to death with a deadly blow to the balls and someone SOMEONE will tell me to write a rant about being kicked in the nuts. My FAVORITE thing people tell me to write rants about is when I hang out with them. Do not get me wrong, I do have a story week coming up where it will just be stories of stupid adventures with me and my cronies, but sometimes we will do something just plain boring and they say how I should write a rant about that.

No, I do not want to write about driving to the store with you to buy condoms/tampons.

Blech.

I use garbage bags anyway.

TMI? Ew.

Not only that, I will answer questions in class and people will just laugh at it. I am talking serious questions. I can get into an argument about abortion and people will laugh at my answer and then proceed to tell me to write a rant about it.

Asljfdslkafjsad.

Now do not get me wrong, I LOVE ideas, I LOVE feedback, and I LOVE vagina.

Ha. You were not expecting that third one were you?

But sometimes it is overkill. I mean, a few people have even told me to write rants about themselves. What makes you SO interesting huh? Hmmmm?

Shoot, I should have a dictionary for myself. You would only be able to purchase it in adult only stores anyway.

My website will have a disclaimer on it.

But, who is good at web design? Anyone want to hop on this bandwagon?